Twas the Month Before Christmas

Twas the month before Christmas, when all through the facebook
not a person was posting, not even myself.
The stores were all stocking for Christmas with care
in hopes that the people soon would buy there.
The ornaments were hung all snug on their hooks
while visions of turkeys were fast overlooked,
and you with your memes and me with my sarcasm
had settled on Christmas with great enthusiasm,
when out of the blue there arose such a flutter.
I sprang from my holly to see what was the matter.
Away to the yard I flew in a flash,
tore open the door and it slammed with a smash.
The sun shining bright on the leaves below
gave tint to the day of harvest aglow,
when what did appear at the end of my journey
but a great big fat turkey
with an ear of corn in one hand quite essential
to know in that moment I'd forgot something special.
More gobbely than beagles his courses they came.
He whistled and shouted and called them by name,
"Green beans and potatoes mashed and with gravy,
olives and stuffing, casserole and cranberry!
To the top of the stove now cook away all!
Now cook away, bake away, fry away all!"
As leaves flew wild in a hurricane unkempt
I went back inside to try and attempt.
I drew up the page with my hands at the ready.
There it was in my mind, memories aplenty.
I wrote and I posted more thankful than ever
to remind all the people of the bird with the feather.
They'd skipped something special to be grateful for
and I laughed when I finished in spite of my report.
Stock in the pot and sage scenting the air.
The pies oh the pies do I even dare
to make more than two
with gusto I do.
Away Christmas flew back out of November.
I sprang to remember to post my reminder.
I exclaim so now I need you to listen,
on Thanks Giving day that turkey will glisten.

Getting Off Foodstamps

This is a misleadingly titled blog post because it is more about getting kicked off food stamps and at the same time feeling forced to stay on food stamps. I'm getting ahead of myself.

There are 12 people in my family, we are all included on one food stamps case (which is awesome btw cause you know we're poly). Both men in our family work full time at higher than minimum wage. All together we earn a net income of $52,000. Hell Yeah right... well sort of. It spreads thin fast. According to the government we live just below the poverty line. The problem is, Brian got a raise. This means we live in fear each month of making too much money.

Each month we spend about $1000 on groceries. That means budgeting and hardcore planning just to keep it that low. Food stamps covers about 2/3 of that amount and we cover the rest.

Don't misunderstand, I so badly want to be off food stamps. I just don't want to be constantly struggling for food. I want to be able to get out of poverty without wanting to get back on food stamps because living on that much less food money sucks the life out of us.

Not including food,the breakdown of our bills for a year goes like this:
Rent= $10,500
Electric= $4,800
Water= $1,800
Car Payment= $4,320
Insurance= $1,800
Phones= $1,200
Internet= 1,500
Gas= $4,700
Then, after all that, there is medicine, field trips, school clothes, school supplies, birthdays, holidays, clothes that fit the season, shoes, diapers, toilet paper, dish soap, laundry detergent... the list of necessities goes on and we will calculate that list to be $10,000

Total for bills not including food: $40,620

Wow that leaves plenty for food right? 52,000 - 40,620 = 11,380 divide that by 12 months:

$950 a month for FOOD! That is only $50 short of the current budget!

wait, wait, wait... Our daughter has visits with her dad that I didn't account for. The jeep is broken down and needs fixed. The toilet won't flush and the AC stopped working in 100 degree weather. A family member passed in another state. Life in general happened.

At this point, off food stamps, money is so tight that I wish Brian never got the promotion to mechanic that he always wanted.

So, we are on the verge of getting kicked off food stamps, but even if that doesn't happen... I want to get off food stamps and actually live a quality life with my family. Did I mention you aren't allowed to save money or they will kick you off for having too much money? That means no saving for a better future like we're supposed to.

This blog post went in a very ranty direction, but if you are still reading this, I'd like to get to the point that made me want to write it in the first place.

I googled "how to get off food stamps" and found literally nothing but other rants. Not helpful

I've added to my first quarter goals for 2017 to get off food stamps.
Here's what I'm thinking, I'll grow food and get chickens and maybe some other animals and try to spend as little actual money as possible. I wean us off food stamps by spending less of what they give us each month. So, if they give us 100 then in January I'll only spend 66. In February I'll spend 33 and March I'll spend none. If I can accomplish that then I'll be off food stamps and on our own feet.

I just thought of another problem though... If we don't qualify for foo stamps then we don't qualify for insurance either... poverty sucks. My thought process is probably flawed idk.