"Will you marry me?" she said.
"I already said I would." I'm a grumpy morning person. I turned away from her snuggling into my pillow. "Why?" I added peaking out from my pillow.
"Because it's legal now."
That is how I found out about today's decision. Not from Facebook or the news and not from talking to anyone. I was proposed to and I imagine that I'm not the only person who received a proposal on this historic day. There are thousands of couples who are celebrating today with reckless abandon and they should be.
But I am not one of them.
Don't get me wrong I am profoundly proud of our nation today for having made it this far but they left me here in the dust joking with my girlfriend about something that should be so meaningful. Joking about one of the most romantic things that happen in a relationship.
Do I feel free today? No, I don't.
When one of my partners goes to the hospital we have to trick the nursing staff into letting us all go back and it doesn't always work. The same is true for when my children go to the hospital. We usually just pick two parents to take them because it's a struggle to sit in the waiting room alone when all you want to do is hold your child. We are forced to explain ourselves everywhere we go if we want to be understood or accepted. And you know what, we're very lucky. We have encountered acceptance almost everywhere. People see us and how normal we are. Nobody has thrown anything at us. I call that a win, but like many gay couples... I want it to be official. I want the rights to my spouses that come along with committing my life to them and I want to know that when I am gone, my afterlife is in the hands of the people I chose.
That stuff matters to me, and I hate that it is up to anyone else how formal or official or legitimate my relationships are. So, yes LGBTQ won today and I have fought for that for the last decade but oppression is still very present in the united states today.
I don't mean for this to sound so angsty. I'm not feeling like a sullen brat today. I just want to remind everyone that the fight is far from over. One huge obstacle was conquered today and there are more ahead but I have every confidence the path has been cleared.
On a lighter note my girlfriend and think it would be fun to get divorced and marry each other... or get divorced every decade and swap who we are legally married to. Part of me considers it an option but should we have to sacrifice in that way? wouldn't it just be simpler to accept us and move on? Our relationship isn't gonna go away.
Even the right wing people feel like polygamy is next. LESS THAN 5 YEARS some people think and I am so ready. *spoilers* we're not waiting until it's legalized...
https://twitter.com/MZHemingway/status/614441132295081984
http://mediamatters.org/research/2015/06/26/right-wing-media-respond-to-nationwide-marriage/204166
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